since it appears that i have barely a moment to create any new entries, this entry will appear in bullet fashion, accounting for notable occurrences and humorous items.
– funny anti-bush stickers that i haven’t seen frequently:
— bush + dick = fucked
— somewhere in texas, a village has lost its idiot
– i voted last week in texas’ early voting. i tried to hold out as long as i could, b/c i’m convinced that all electronic votes are going to be hijacked and/or lost. not that it matters, b/c travis county is pretty much the only democratic stronghold in this overwhelmingly republican pro-bush state. but i figured that lines would be outrageous on election day, and texas is going to bush anyway. a bit of irony, though – the crawford daily newspaper has apparently endorsed kerry…
– while noting who isn’t endorsing bush, it’s pretty significant that the economist has endorsed kerry.
– it’s also notable that the bush campaign is consistently making up all sorts of stupid shit.
— the bush campaign website has blocked all non-US internet traffic. they haven’t released any info regarding their reasons, and nobody i know can come up w/ anything to explain it. are they that afraid of dealing w/ the rest of the world? i really can’t fathom this one – they’re specifically using the internet in a way antithetical to the internet’s purpose.
–yup, these photos really prove that the missing explosives were moved before US troops got there. there very well could be other explosives moved by US troops, though. my favorite part of this fiasco is that the Bush admin claims the explosive may have been moved before US troops arrived by relying on satellite imagery showing trucks outside the bunkers where these weapons were stored. ahem…isn’t this the same faulty method used by the Bush admin to state they knew exactly where Saddam kept his supposed weapons of mass destruction??
–it seems to me that everyone hears about bush’s significant faux pas, but i’m wrong. there are many people who appear unaware that bush thinks ob/gyn’s should practice their love w/ women, or that he adamently supports the creation of a drafted army, or that he’s not concerned about bin-laden, or that he supports relations between sovereign entities. but it’s ok, b/c it’s hard work.
–here’s a moving rallying cry to unseat bush.
-off the bush subject, i got a new phone yesterday. my nokia 6200 kept shutting itself off, and it wasn’t a battery issue. i managed to get at&t to give me a $99 credit towards a new phone. as my contract was about to expire, i extended that for 2 yrs as well (i have a charter plan that gives me unlimited minutes, so i’m not going to let that slip away). by extending my contract, i got a super cheap deal on a new phone – the LG 1150 camera flip phone for $110. add my $99 credit and an additional $50 rebate, and i made $40 off the deal. sweet.
— it’s too bad i feared for my life on the bus last night after i got the new phone, b/c some of those freaks would have made great subjects using the new cameraphone. really, i’ve never seen more crazies on the bus than i did last night, and it had nothing to with halloween.
and so it begins…
for real, yo. it’s 90% humid outside and 85 degrees. it’s almost november. actually, i wouldn’t care that its almost november b/c different locations have different climates. fine, i can deal with that. but its opressive out there! i feel like the air is sucked out of me when i step outside.
why did you make austin’s weather patterns so horrendous? it’s been muggy and humid and hot for months. you gave us a week of cool weather, but now it’s back to nastiness. was that a taunt? are you fucking with us? it’s the middle of october already! why 90 degrees and humid? come on already! snap the fuck out of it and make it bearable outside!
the other night, i went out w/ a friend to some bars. we ended up hopping to a few different bars b/c the people we met up with couldn’t make up their minds where to stay. that’s ok, no problem.
so we head out to our final destination of the night, sky bar, on congress ave. understand that by this time, it’s nearly 1:30am and austin closes at 2am. sky bar is still charging cover. off the bat, i hate bars that charge cover – i really get annoyed when they still charge cover even though there’s 30 minutes left till closing and the bar isn’t full. again, i’m w/ other people so i don’t get bothered by it. 2 friends go inside to use the atm so that they can pay cover. i pay for myself and another guy (part of this group) who i met for the first time 20 minutes earlier. he goes in, but i get stopped by the cashier lady:
“i’m holding you as collateral.”
“for what?” say i.
“for your friends. just stand there for a moment.” says she.
“ok, whatever.” say i, thinking this will be, as she says, a moment.
4 minutes later (not 5 minutes, mind you) she says “were those your friends?”
“you mean the ones you were holding me collateral for? yes.” say i.
“well they’re gone.” says she.
“ok, well then i’m going in.” say i, and proceed to pass through the entry portal of the SKY BAR.
“oh no,” says she, “i’m still holding you for collateral.”
“what are you talking about? what collateral?” say i.
“your friends didn’t pay. they were going to use the atm to get the cover. i’m holding you for collateral until they pay.” says she.
“no you’re not. that has nothing to do with me. i’m sorry you didn’t pay attention to them, but i already payed my cover.” say i.
“no, she says. you can’t go in until they pay.” says she.
“look, i’m sorry you messed up, but it’s not my fault, and i’m going in.” say i.
being the intimidating menace that i am, my actions call the attention of the bouncer, who, though being 2 inches shorter than me, has been popping steroids since conception, and could definitely snap me if he so wished.
“what are you starting?” says he.
“nothing, i payed my cover and i’m going inside.” say i.
“his friends didn’t pay their cover.” says she.
“then you’re not going inside.” says he.
“yes i am. it’s not my fault that you guys screwed up.” i try to side-step him to get inside.
“you don’t want this.” says he, as he gets 2 inches from my face.
“dude, i payed my cover, i didn’t do anything, i’m going in.” say i.
“you’re getting your friends to pay the fucking cover.” says he. this continues back and forth for a few more moments.
the cashier lady holds my license as ‘collateral’. now i have to go find my friends. i side step steroid-boy w/ the acknowledgement that i am going to find my friends. i find my friend, and tell her that steroid-boy wants to kick my ass for the following reasons:
1. i purposely didn’t get intimidated by his power hungry act.
2. i didn’t want to find my friends for him.
“nonetheless, they’re holding my license hostage, so please go pay your cover.” say i.
“haha, that’s funny. ok, let me go to the atm.”
“i’m right fucking here, where are your friends.” says steroid-boy as he magically appears behind me.
“i’m talking to her, calm down buddy.” say i. this pisses him off tremendously.
“don’t get in my fucking face, boy. you don’t want a piece of this.” as he gets in my face again, spitting a bit in his anger. i wipe my face in retalliation and walk away.
“hey, don’t fucking walk away from me.” more spit on the back of my neck. i wipe my neck.
“you can stop spitting on me now.” say i. this is fun.
“get the fuck out of my bar you fucking dick.” says he. funny, i wasn’t aware that the owners of crappy bars are also midget bouncers that get all huffy. i didn’t say that, i definitely would have gotten beat down for that.
so i follow my friend to the atm w/ steroid-boy following me, taunting me for being such a dick. the atm is by the entrance, so steroid-boy makes a very visible exchange with the other bouncer.
“watch that dick. he’s trouble.”
my friend and i laugh at the absurdity of this jackass and go get some drinks.
i bet that if the media were to actually make note of bush’s horrendous performance in the first presidential debate, this election would be kerry’s – hands down. i know so many people who don’t read up on the candidates’ positions, and get all their information and opinions from tv news and brief glimpses at newspapers or news websites – and i mean brief. the bush camp can easily spin the debate off by saying it’s a draw and redirecting criticism towards kerry’s comments, which is what they’re doing. granted, anybody who actually watched the debate and has the capacity to breathe clearly saw that kerry was the winner. apparently, though, there are many people who watched the debate w/o the capacity to breathe.
if cnn or nbc or anybody would mention – not even in a partisan sense, just reporting the fact – that bush faltered for a solid 5 seconds on more than one occassion, or that he made a joke of a concept b/c he either couldn’t understand it or couldn’t answer it – i’d bet that a lot of on-the-fence bush supporters would switch to kerry. they just need to hear it from a ‘reputable’ news source.
also, urbancoral.com is now live. at the moment it just redirects you to this website, but it will eventually become its own monster.